I Was Born Sick (But I Love You)
by TheMadKatter13
Summary: His Steve never looked better than when he was bouncing in Bucky's lap, stuffed with his cock. Pre-Serum, Top Bucky / Bottom Steve


**Inspired by conversations with (I think) reclusiveq &amp; stephrc79, and this NSFW gif (themadkatter13fanfiction tumblr, post/115573879773). I wrote the first paragraph a few months back then stopped, per my norm, then I downloaded this song (youtube, watch?v=MYSVMgRr6pw) before leaving for work this morning, listened to it twice, then couldn't stop thinking about this WIP. So instead of going back to sleep during my commute, I put said song on repeat and finished and posted this fic while on my mobile on the bus (hence any mistakes).**

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There was a lot Bucky was going to hell for, what with his general ways of immorality, but most of all, he deserved to go to hell for loving Steve Rogers. Stevie was the one good thing in his life, an honest-to-God wholesome soul who trusted him, and Bucky was tainting him with his selfish inability to not take. Stevie though, despite letting his best friend do to him whatever Bucky wanted, didn't deserve any other final end than heaven. But his Steve never looked better than when he was bouncing in Bucky's lap, stuffed with his cock.

"Hah- hah- ha- Bu- Buck- y," his friend gasped, his weak voice the only sound in their barren, freezing apartment. The sound was heaven to his ears, audible proof of the pleasure he could provide Steve even as he corrupted him.

"So good, Steve," he murmured back, his left hand shaking when it rose to brush back floppy blond hair soaked in sweat. "You're so tight and you feel so good, baby."

Steve gave a high whine at the pet name, one Bucky only ever used when he was taking him, and to his surprise, came between them without either of their hands around his small cock. Startled, Bucky almost froze, but he had enough presence of mind to at least fuck his lover through his orgasm, only slowing when Stevie was trembling and unable to catch his breath. Then he realised Stevie couldn't catch his breath.

"Fuck!" He turned quickly and guided Steve to lay back on the couch. Fingernails clawed at his shoulders as his asthmatic lover struggled to breath and Bucky felt his heart stutter in fear as he tilted Steve's head back and placed a firm but helpless palm over a heart racing like a rabbit.

"I have to go get the nebulizer. I'll be right back, I promise." The fingernails against his skin clawed harder, but he easily extracted himself and rushed to the bathroom, ignoring the way his stiff, wet cock bounced against his stomach, too busy praying the last device he bought was still under the sink. It was. He sent a thanks to Heaven for them letting him keep his Stevie with him a little longer and rushed back out, ripping the box open as he went.

It was, as always, a terrifyingly long time before his lover was breathing normally again, too long before his heart calmed. Bucky was on edge by the time Steve was smiling blearily at him from behind the small glass mouthpiece, his cock now soft despite having not found its own release. He struggled to smile back as he kept squeezing the rubber ball in time with the smaller man's still-shaky breaths, his palm glued to the space of skin above Stevie's heart. When hands finally knocked his away, Bucky sat back on his heels and raked his hair off his forehead with fingers that trembled.

Steve tried to sit up and Bucky made no move to help him, hoping he would just stay there and let his weak body recover. He knew better than that. His lover finally got himself upright and toppled into Bucky's chest, curling there just like the way he'd curled in the cavity of Bucky's chest.

"You didn't come," Steve rasped as thin fingers brushed high on his thigh. Bucky barked out a laugh that sounded more like a sob and wrapped his arms around his best friend as he buried his face in Steve's neck.

"Not important," he said, voice muffled by the other man's skin.

Steve hummed a sound of disbelief, but didn't press the issue, just curled up smaller and pressed tighter to Bucky, breath still wheezing through his lungs. It had been getting worse every time they had sex, and he wondered if that was the pay-off: the more he loved, the faster they tried to take Stevie from him, the harder heaven tried to purify his best friend of Bucky's sin. Eventually, he'll love so much that he'll need to rip his heart from his chest to be free of its torment, and the only thing he would have left to love would be a fragile, beautiful corpse.

He clung tightly to the weak body against his and prayed: _'I'll gladly go to hell if it means being able to love him, but please, please don't take him from me. Please don't make me live without him.'_ There was no response- Bucky hadn't really expected one- but he continued to pray as he rubbed his palm repeatedly over a back that rattled with every breath. He held his lover and prayed that his sins weren't great enough to void Steve's ticket to heaven.

FIN

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**Woops.**

**The tumblr post (themadkatter13fanfiction tumblr, post/115573976033). Tschüß. :3**


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